Ways of Parting

embrace all of his ugly greed and selfishness.
It was a bizarre experience.

Tap. 

The half-filled glass of water sloshed and created waves.
Even though it was only a short outing, his whole body throbbed as if he had been hit, and no strength could be exerted to the tips of his fingers.
In the end, even holding the glass became difficult, so he put it down on the console table.
The device next to it still had a black screen and no signs of movement.
The answer to the message Ha Joyoon had sent to Kang Taejung a few hours ago was, as expected, only silence.
That was his decision.

After meaninglessly touching his phone, he came back, buried himself in the soft bed, and closed his eyes deeply.
The thin eyelids trembled gently.
The pale complexion shone under the frosty light, creating a precarious atmosphere as if he would disappear just as he was.
Ha Joyoon began to draw out traces of the past one by one.
It was for a task to distinguish between what should be thrown away and what should be kept.

The hard-to-swallow pill slowly ran down his throat and passed into his body.
The ripple effect of the nail-sized lump of white powder was so great that the headache that had plagued him all day was deeply suppressed.
At last, the moment of liberation came.
Transparent tears fell from the corners of his tightly closed eyes, as they quietly created a path.
Suddenly, he thought that it would be nice if he could fix his heart with just one pill as well.

That included love, memories, and pain. 

***

Thump- Thump- Thump- The rhythmic music filled the closed space.
The sophisticated interior and soft lighting that illuminated the space made the atmosphere of the club more dreamy.
The cheerful melody and the people who were more relaxed than usual without hesitation whispered secrets with others and enjoyed a secret deviation.
In the corner of the counter bar where glasses and money were frantically flowing, someone familiar sat down after pulling the stool.
The gaze that scanned the people was quite contemplative.
Moments later, the blonde-haired bartender who spotted the man came closer and waved his hand.

 

“Been a while.”

In a short but affectionate tone, the lower corners of the eyes bent nicely. 

“Sungjae-ya, it’s been a while.
There’s quite a lot of people?”

“Well, it’s Saturday.
Have you been drinking? Your face looks a little off.”

His shy smile had already turned red from drunkenness.
He lightly rubbed one of his cheeks as he made a playful excuse.

“Haha, a little.
I just drank a little.” 

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Seo Youngwoo, who pointed to the menu and ordered the kind he always drank, looked inside again with his side-eyes.
Inside the club, there were many familiar and unfamiliar faces.
Set.
A blue liquid resembling the Caribbean Sea filled the glass.

“Why is it so hard to see your face? Did you think you became a celebrity after you started dating?”

Seo Youngwoo closed his round eyes as the other person teased him mischievously.

“It’s not like that, I’ve just been busy lately.
There were… some things I had to deal with.” 

“What sort of things? Isn’t it enough to date someone you’ve been in love with for years?”

“Well… you’re right.”

It was only a few months ago that he was so happy about Kang Taejung finally accepting his confession.
Park Sungjae didn’t feel all that great from hearing the man’s name because he had heard about Kang Taejung’s vague attitude through Seo Youngwoo.
In one way or another, he had a close relationship with Seo Youngwoo.
There was no way there was a feeling of like for a man who had only coldly ignored his friend who was trying to approach him seriously.

“What exactly do you like about that guy? Judging by your condition, is he really treating you well?” 

Seo Youngwoo, who took a sip of the well-made cocktail, opened his eyes wide and smiled brightly.

“Hyung has been really sweet and is treating me well these days.
He’s really kind and does his best for me.”

“That guy? Well sure-.
Then why do you look like that?”

“What about me? This bastard….” 

Seo Youngwoo carefully put his hands together, eyeing the people who flocked to the cocktail bar.
Depression subsided in his eyes.
It was just another piece of his dark and heavy heart that had been gnawing his mind little by little for a very long time.

“Aren’t you quite busy?”

 

“Hey, bastard.
I’m the main guy here.
Look at how many subordinates there are.
It’s fine, punk.”

Park Sungjae smiled at the somewhat timid voice and stroked Seo Youngwoo’s black hair.
Seo Youngwoo, who looked around once more, opened his tightly closed lips as if he had made up his mind. 

”That… person came back.”

“That person?”

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He was good at mixing the drinks that had been ordered.
Responding indifferently, Park Sungjae started shaking the shaker filled with various drinks and alcohol.
It was only a few minutes later that a meek voice came out.

“The person Hyung used to date.” 

Crash.
The shaker fell on the table with a harsh sound.
Park Sungjae, without even erasing the absurdity on his face, blinked several times and opened his mouth.

“Did… Didn’t you say that he was dead? Did his ghost come back?”

Seo Youngwoo groaned and let out a small chuckle at Park Sungjae’s response.

“… He didn’t die, he just went missing, but somehow he ended up coming back.
Apparently he was injured.” 

It would’ve been better if it were rather his ghost. Even the mumbling voice that pretended to be playful had a hard time hiding his despair.
Seo Youngwoo closed his eyes tightly again.
His distant heart was pounding as if empty and dry.
It may be because of the dry air.
The stone that had been pressing down on his chest for a long time now had gone past its limits, and it felt like it would burst the guts out of his whole body.
A voice that could not hide its gloom flowed out amidst the cheerful beat.

“Sungjae-ya.
I really am trash.”

“Trash? Did someone say anything to you?”

The sound of his kind friend’s voice made the emotions that he had been holding back for days rise up in tears.
Seo Youngwoo, without even thinking about hiding his distorted expression in agony, uttered the words he had been meaning to say. 

“He returned to the country not too long ago, and visited Hyung’s place.
Luckily, he was with me, so nothing happened….”

“Hey, where and how did that bastard find him? You too….”

“Do you know what I was thinking when I saw that person?”

“Yeah?” 

“Why did you have to come back?”

“…….”

 

“Wish you died there instead of coming back.”

The out-of-focus eyes were blurred.
A secret that he couldn’t tell anyone came out in a rather stark manner.
In front of his lover, he pretended to be a good person and acted like an open-minded person, but the truth was that his heart was burning black.